Once you have the look and the attitude , you want to get yourself out there , and start perpetuating gross and pathetic stereotypes .
A cheap Hotel anywhere along Sukhumvit road , Bangkok , will do . Don't worry about cleanliness , hygiene or anything of the like , because the girls you will be sleeping with certainly don't .
Sure they may insist upon taking a shower , coming out hidden by a towel , and then making sure you have sex with the lights off . Use this as an opportunity to to lie to yourself that it has to do with them being “shy” . Find this endearing and sweet . Do NOT allow yourself to consider the reality that in fact it has almost everything to do with the fact that either:
All of the above .Whatever happens Don't allow inconvenient truths to bother you .A girl who dances naked on a pole , is shy about her body . Obviously .
A) She finds you grotesque
B) She has a unsightly “rash” ,or most likely
When having sex with her , don't use a condom . After all , you gave up on life , and deeply hate women for the years of ridicule they bestowed upon you . Murder . It's no big deal . Hitler did it .
Insist upon shagging her in the ass .Because it's the most painful and degrading way .And you can .
Underpay her . Accuse her of greed if she wants a fair price . She's just some third world whore , not the sort of person you respect . Until you marry her .
Always boast and feel superior about how “wealthy” you are . You saved up for the whole year for these two weeks .Ensure that every woman always thinks she will have easy access to your money in exchange for sex . Shout from the rooftops how generous and rich you are . This will attract many financially needy women , who might sleep with you at discounted rates in some hope of a future investment in financial stability .
When the money runs out and the girls disappear because they discovered you are just another idiotic pauper , be sure to complain to everyone how these girls only wanted your money . Ignore the fact that you spent every waking hour , you weren't sticking your roger up their todger , trying to impress and convince them of your fabled riches .
Even though your actions directly marketed themselves to the tiny percentage of dishonest , lying ,crack whore members of Thai society , be sure to grossly generalize , accusing ALL THAI women of being “gold digging” lying whores . Don't lose sleep with any analogies of fishing in a putrid pond with rotten bait .
When all is said and done , jump out a window in Pattaya , and complete your artistic contribution to the human condition .
